a moment to refocusonlife ~ Christmas

Merry Christmas everyone! I've waited all year to say those words. I adore Christmas time. It truly is my favorite holiday. 

For me, it used to be all about the gifts. I guess it's age, but now it's more about spending time with my beautuful family and friends, seeing my kid's joy of ripping open their gifts, and the meals. 

Mark & Lauren 12/21/2013

I've discussed it before, but the buffet style meals are a huge problem for me. If I sit down at a table with a fixed portion of food, I'm fine, but if there's an endless supply of good food at my fingertips, I can barely contain myself. It's a weakness that I have NO idea how to overcome.

That coupled with the fact that I live in constant fear of regaining the weight I lost and this time of the year stresses me out at times. 

But, I choose to focus on one hour at a time. I truly am a food addict. If there's one thing I know about addiction, it's that addiction can be controlled, but never cured. I live with that knowledge, so I make choices every day knowing that I may relapse. 

Me & Christian 12/21/2013

Last night at a Christmas party (Saturday 12/21), I relapsed. I ate my weight in food that I haven't eaten in months. That was last night. I choose to move forward today and live with the knowledge that I've made a huge mistake, but I also choose to start over today. 

So, just for today, I will eat like my disease (diabetes) mandates. I say just for today, but if I have to live hour by hour or minute by minute, then I will! 

Yes, it's Christmas, but unless I want to rehoe a row I've already been down, I will choose vegetables over cookies today. 

Alright everyone...here it comes: Merry Christmas! Happy Kwanza! Happy Hannakuh! I hope you all have an amazing holiday season!